Showing posts with label Mommy Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mommy Life. Show all posts

17 February 2012

Friday Five: Five Things I'm Good At

Over at The Collective, the topic of the week is "Five Things I'm Good At", although being uncomfortable with phrases ending in a manner prepositional, I would probably restate it as "Five Things At Which I Am Good". And since I haven't done a Friday Five in a while, I thought I'd steal the theme to prompt for a blog post.

At first, this topic sounded pretty easy. I generally remark that one of the curses of being me is that I'm actually pretty good at a lot of stuff, but I'm not great at anything. So surely I could find five things wherein my performance could be described as "good". Right? But then I remembered that many of the things I do well are actually things I used to do well and haven't done for a while. Example: Dance. I was no Anna Pavlova, but I was at least good enough at ballet that my ballet teacher asked me to work as her teaching aide for some of her younger classes. But unfortunately, the summer before I was to start doing that, she had emergency surgery on her foot and couldn't dance or teach anymore, so not only was I not helping teach ballet but I didn't even have a ballet teacher myself, and I never found another instructor that I liked, and so I stopped dancing in my senior year of high school. I haven't done ballet for 15+ years and while I'd like to start dancing seriously again, my lifestyle (single parent who works fulltime) doesn't support that kind of effort. Life is about trade-offs. Oh! But I'm kind of good at trade-offs, then, right?
  1. Trade-offs - I still have a lot to learn and gain in this area, but I'm pretty good at maximizing what I can do within the restrictions of what I can't. Does that make sense? Case in point: graduate school. Now, I'm as dedicated as anyone to wanting to get straight A grades, and I have for most of my life. But during the majority of my time in grad school, I was working fulltime and married. I could have done nothing but work and schoolwork the whole time, and come away with a perfect 4.0 GPA, but I decided that I wanted to spend time with my husband and family and friends, go to Disneyland, read fun books, watch movies and TV... Basically, I opted for having a life while also working and in school, and so I was willing to take a GPA between 3.8 and 3.9. I graduated with high honors and managed to do most of what I wanted. Not bad, all told. [Note: This is an engineering trait. We are essentially lazy; we devise ways to get maximum return for minimum investment and then use terms like "efficiency" and "earned value" to paint ourselves as virtuous and disguise our inherent lack of interest in putting forth any more effort than is absolutely necessary.]
  2. Being a dedicated mother - I've had to accept that nobody can be a perfect parent 100% of the time, but I really do care about being a good mother and try hard at it every day. I'm going to count myself a success, because after more than 4 years, my child is still alive, relatively healthy and well-adjusted. He solves puzzles far above his age level and can do addition and subtraction in his head.
  3. Traveling - My style may not be to everyone's taste, but all things considered, I'm very very good at traveling, especially internationally. I make good packing lists. I can include everything that might be needed but travel light and pack everything into an impossibly small piece of luggage. [My primary fault is packing too much reading material--books and magazines are heavy, you know--but to be stuck in an airport or airplane without something to read would be a travesty.] I try to know everything I can about my destination(s). If I'm traveling with companions, I might even put together little travel-sized pamphlets for everybody, containing useful things like maps, our itinerary and schedule (even though we don't usually stick to our schedule), phone numbers to the American embassy and our hotel/airline, even (if necessary) key phrases in languages spoken where we'll be traveling. I probably already know a lot about the history and geography of our destination(s) (see #4, below) but I'll research everything that I don't already know and then bore you to tears by telling you about it. When in country, I'll spend way too much time in museums, staring in awe at some particular artifact that is very important to me, even though it looks like just a dusty old piece of rock to everyone else. Despite my US passport, I am invariably mistaken to be German, even by flight attendants on Lufthansa, so it makes for some fun and funny confusion at times. If we get stranded anywhere, miss a flight, lose luggage, whatever, I'll be loads of fun in the airport while we wait, and I'll make sure that everything turns out all right in the end (okay, I don't have any control over most of what happens in airports, but I will always maintain a positive attitude and take care of my friends). Lets save up several thousand dollars and go to Europe together--you won't regret it, I promise!
  4. Retaining obscure knowledge - I remember all kinds of generally useless facts on any and all subjects. I read a lot and have good recollection for things that I've read. This makes me a force with which to be reckoned at Trivial Pursuit. Sadly, unless I go on Jeopardy, this mastery of trivia is unlikely to be beneficial in a monetary sense.
  5. Old movies - I have spent many hours of my life watching classic old movies, from silents (veritable antiques) to 1960s epics (not so old). I really enjoy films from a bygone era, and as with general trivia, I remember pretty much everything about my old movies. I can recognize even obscure character actors. I know all about German expressionism, film noir, new wave, and other cinematic trends. I have strong opinions about a lot of things related to film in general. Good times, good times.

22 December 2011

Kids Say the Darnedest Things: The Little Bug Edition

Am I the only person who despises reading blogs wherein the writer is a parent who dotes upon his or her offspring and believes said children to be full of charm and brilliance and possessed of qualities that render them a little lower than the angels? Just me? Okay, then. *ahem* Well, I have now become that which I most hate and fear. [I'm pretty sure there's a sobering and deeply meaningful moral somewhere in there.] The Little Bug is reaching the age of crazy and hilarious statements and I just may start documenting some of them. If you hate reading these kinds of irritating cutesy items, feel free to skip. I won't be offended.

Today: We were discussing fossils, because he's my child and therefore we're as likely to be talking about paleontology as anything.
First, "Fossils are called ants!"
And as I was still trying to sort out that first statement, he came out with "Fish fossils are angry."

Sure, kid, whatever you say.

16 November 2011

Downward Spiral

Has anyone else ever noticed that when you start to make mistakes, then things seem to just pile one upon the other till you have a whole heap of failure in front of you? That's how I feel about my life all the time. I try really hard to do the right things, and do them well, but so often, I feel as if I'm the most horrible, useless, irresponsible person on the planet.

I try so hard. I can do the basics. I keep my child fed and clothes, and we have a roof over our head and our living space is generally safe and warm. My cats are well-fed and healthy. We're all pretty well-adjusted. I haven't committed any crimes; I even drive the speed limit. I'm a productive member of society. I work full-time, and my supervisor and coworkers have had few complaints about what I do. I vote regularly. I support my church and my local public library.

Why can't that be enough?

But no, our society doesn't work that way. As evidenced by my to-do posts below, I always have so much to do, to stuff into those all-too-few moments in between working, commuting, mothering, cooking, cleaning... There are phone calls to make, papers to organize and file, best-sellers to be written. I have to provide snacks for the daycare or another activity. I'm the sole provider for my family, and I'm also the parent, the homeowner, the CEO and general manager of the household. And God help us if I don't serve 100% organic, locally sourced food, and if I don't exercise daily in order to keep myself looking like a bikini model. It's overwhelming. If I let one thing slip, everything else starts to go as well. How does anyone actually managing to hold a modern life together without spinning like a whirling dervish and then imploding from the craziness?

It's days like this that I want to crawl back into bed, pull the covers over my head, and wish the entire outside world far far away.

08 November 2011

One Week In - I FAIL

Hello, dear readers! I'm so sorry that I already failed to post on at least one day of NaBloPoMo. You see, I intended to post on my blog last night, but I fell asleep while putting my Little Bug to bed, and so that was what happened. That's life when you're a single parent with a preschooler.

This week has marked a few adventures already.
  • On Sunday, the Little Bug spent several hours in a pair of undies without any accidents. This is a huge milestone in our one-step-forward-two-steps-back journey through potty training.
  • On Monday, I started my low-key fitness routine that I hope to incorporate into our lifestyle. I've been doing some simple yoga in the mornings to build up my strength, balance, and flexibility. I haven't exercised regularly for a few years (since I was pregnant, in fact), so I'm very out of shape. Once I've achieved a basic level of fitness, I'll add more challenging routines and increase my cardiovascular workout. I'm doing exercises that can be done in my home, because it's really close to impossible to do outside workouts without a jogging stroller (plus winter is coming, which will preclude any outside stuff for 5 or so months) and joining a gym is too daunting (especially with having to put the Bug in yet another childcare situation while I do classes or a circuit, because I would hate just shuffling him from one caretaker to another when I just want to spend time being a real parent) and too expensive. My sister gave me a Jillian Michaels DVD that looks as if it will be incredible in a few weeks, when I finally will be able to do the workout all the way through instead of dying in the middle.
  • I've cooked and baked, and I'm pleased to report that the new stove is just magnificent so far.

04 November 2011

More singing

You can imagine how proud I am that, in addition to sometimes singing "When He Cometh", the Little Bug now sings along to the theme song for Daria.

"La-la-la-la-la."

03 November 2011

Precious Children

I put my Little Bug to bed nearly every night, and he always asks me to sing him a song. He specifically requests a song he has termed "the precious children song". And I always comply. Sometimes I ask him if he wants to sing too, and he just shakes his head. So imagine my surprise when, night before last, he suddenly piped up and sang with me on the choruses (with almost all the words being correct!):
Like the stars of the morning
His bright crown adorning,
They shall shine in their beauty:
Bright gems for His crown.

The song is one that my parents sang to me when I myself was a tiny tot, under the title of "When He Cometh". It was one of the first songs I taught myself to play by ear on the piano. I don't know how widely it is sung in the general population, however. Here are the lyrics as I learned them.

When He cometh, when He cometh
To take up His jewels,
All His jewels, precious jewels,
His loved and His own.

Like the stars of the morning
His bright crown adorning,
They shall shine in their beauty:
Bright gems for His crown.

Little children, little children
Who love their Redeemer
Are His jewels, precious jewels,
His loved and His own.

Like the stars of the morning
His bright crown adorning,
They shall shine in their beauty:
Bright gems for His crown.

The Cyber Hymnal has a MIDI of the tune and slightly different words for the lyrics. I have to pull out my keyboard to play it, and learn it on the guitar as well. I want to pass on to my Little Bug all the sweet, simple songs that my parents gave to me, because they are a part of our heritage as a family and as believers. I've never forgotten the hymns that I learned as a child and consider them to have played a tremendous role in the development and sustainment of my faith. I have reason to think that my Little Bug is responding to the words, and though he does not yet understand the full import of what Jesus has done and is for him, he knows that somehow, somewhere, there is a Redeemer who loves him and holds him as His own precious child.

02 November 2011

Perfection

Some mornings, when there's just a hint of chill in the air, I emerge slowly into the world of wakefulness under my pile of blankets and realize that all three of my boys are snuggled up with me in a jumble of coziness, and it's a moment of perfection that I want to somehow preserve and remember forever.

16 November 2010

Hazards of the Profession

Missed another day. Sorry!

My usual blogging time is in the evening, after the Little Bug is in bed and before I myself stagger off to lay myself down in a horizontal position and drift into unconsciousness for a few hours.

Unfortunately, last night, I was putting the Bug to bed as usual, and I fell asleep. This happens on a rather frequent basis, and while I don't appreciate it (because I get nothing done and then I have a messy apartment in the morning AND I have to shower and do all kinds of stuff that I typically do the night before) I do realize that I probably really need the sleep.

Tackle-It Tuesday

I've been keeping up with a lot of responsibilities in my life, as per usual, but haven't taken advantage of posting anything for Tackle-It Tuesday. Today, I've decided to confront some pressing furniture needs that are looming in my life. I desperately need a few items, and would like to invest in some other items that would simply make my life easier and more productive.

New dresser - My current dresser is in a lamentable state of disrepair. It is more than 20 years old, having been the dresser that my parents bought for me when we moved to the US in 1990. It has been moved more times than I care to calculate at this time, and has been slowly disintegrating for at least 5 years. The lowest drawer does not really work any more; the front has detached from the rest of the drawer, and that bottom cardboard piece has fallen out. I've tried to repair with tacks and wood glue, but it hasn't really worked. Now, the bottom has fallen out of the top drawer. I think this dresser has had a good life, and I can replace it, in good conscience.
New shelves - I own some working bookshelves, but my largest set literally fell apart on my most recent move.
Work table - I don't have any place where I can spread out crafts or work with my sewing machine. The dining room table is where we eat and where lots of action happens, so there is no place for getting creative. I set up the back bedroom as a work/play room, and if I get a folding table, it will be very useful.
Sofa bed or futon - All I have right now is a loveseat that sits maybe two adults comfortably. I have no chairs for guests except my dining room chairs. And if I get a sofa that is multi-functional, then it will also serve as a place for guests to sleep if they visit overnight. I'm thinking of putting the loveseat as a comfy spot in my work/play room and having the newer (longer) sofa in the front room.

And, of course, I have to shop for and obtain all of these items at some point during my lunch breaks, because it is just really difficult shopping for high-stress items with the Bug in tow. Oh, and I have to find useful strong people who are willing to help me bring home, move, and rearrange furniture. Usually, offering food as compensation is a key point in the latter endeavor.

I'll keep you all updated.

11 November 2010

Marketing 2

For the first time EVER, the Little Bug actually ASKED to wear pajama pants! They have Thomas on them, of course.

Now I have high hopes regarding the Thomas bedding that Meema Debbie is sending him for his special new big boy bed... He may soon be ready to sleep on his own!

09 November 2010

Marketing

Conventional wisdom would have us believe that the marketing of popular children's characters is aimed at children. Seems reasonable. However, my theory is that much of the marketing is actually directed toward parents. Case in point: Thomas the Tank Engine outfits from Wal-Mart. I bought three sets (shirt and pants) as winter clothes for the Little Bug. True, they cost $1 or $2 more per set than would a more generic non-branded product. HOWEVER, from a parenting point of view, this relatively tiny markup is MORE THAN WORTH IT. If the Bug has Thomas on his shirt and pants, his resistance to getting dressed in the morning is greatly reduced. It's worth $2 to me just to have one easy morning. Amortizing this cost over an entire winter? PRICELESS!

VALUE isn't just a question of how much something costs in money; it's a question of how much money and effort and some other intangibles are required in outlay, versus utility (and even enjoyment) you will obtain from it, and the appropriate cost-to-use ratio that you yourself are willing to assign. Nobody else can assign value on your behalf. And that's a beautiful part of being a wise and responsible consumer.

07 November 2010

Mommy's Little Helper


Kneading the dough for some rolls.
They're never too young to start learning how to cook!

14 October 2010

So Far, Still Good Anyway

The Little Bug hasn't been sleeping in his bed anymore, but there is always hope.

We've been doing a lot of basic life stuff: going to work and daycare, church, paying bills, and so forth.

05 October 2010

So Far, So Good

The Little Bug actually opted to go to sleep in his own bed, three nights in a row. You have no idea how amazing this is, and what an answer to prayer!

19 July 2010

Long Day 2

In my previous post, I left off very early in the morning of this day. The Little Bug and I made it to bed around 1 am, but he didn't go to sleep till after 2. I really think that Dante missed out on some great material by neglecting to devote one of his Circles of Hell to the description of people (perhaps the Selfish, or maybe the Intemperate) receiving the ghastly punishment of undergoing The Life of a Single Parent Whose Child Refuses to Sleep... FOR ETERNITY.

Anyway, due to sleep deprivation, I didn't get up super-early, and sort of staggered around getting ready, and then we went to daycare and work quite late. I hate it when that happens. I was so tired, but decided to take control of my day and make it work for me. I accomplished:
Productive work for several hours.
Pay bills and rent.
Bank paperwork.
Go to Target to get some shoes for swing dancing.
Go to Toys R Us to see if they carry toddler beds and bedding. I didn't buy any of those, but I did get a treat for my Little Bug.
Do grocery shopping for the week.
Research compost containers and methods.
Take out trash.
Pick up the Little Bug from daycare
Grab dinner and then meet a friend for frozen yogurt.
Come home to bathe and put the Bug to bed.
Get ready for bed.
Tidy up some of the kitchen and bedroom.
Set out clothes for tomorrow.
Make lunches for tomorrow.
Crash onto couch and wait for fatigue to catch up with me enough that I can finally go to sleep.

23 May 2010

Mommy Life

Why yes, there IS a reason why I walked into church an hour late and carrying an unpainted balsa wood toy fire truck. Thanks for asking.